Día de los Muertos

Today I was feeling a bit under the weather most likely because it's getting so cold. Life in the tropics, following four years of California sun, has softened me to the point where 40 degrees can feel like 40 below. But to my surprise I received a heart warming package from my dear friend, Caesareo Ruiz, in Los Angeles, wishing me a "pleasant 31st and 2nd" Halloween and The Day of the Dead.

The package consisted of a tiny book... sewn by hand with various papers repurposed from brown paper bags, tag board, legal pads, sketch books and the like... featuring his exquisite, otherworldly illustrations and eerie vintage photos printed on wax paper. The book even featured a built in envelope that contained a moody mix cd of Mexican folk music and more modern tunes. So I lit some candles, played the soundtrack and thumbed through the pages of his imagination.

The Old Mill

It's been two years now since my grandfather passed away. At the time, I was in the midst of a film shoot and couldn't make it back to the east cost. I will always regret that I didn't come home. But in a way, it was like an alarm calling me closer to my family.

Earlier this fall my sister Amy and I spent a weekend at his house, an old 1840's gristmill which he and my grandmother crafted into a masterpiece of a home. We relaxed, soaked in the beauty, and got to work on some serious creative fun. It's hard not to feel inspired in a place like this. Mama always says the house represents the best of both her parents... grandma's artistry, grandpa's engineering and a unique combined vision. So, I can't think of a better way to honor him than by turning our creative energies toward some family collaborations of our own.

Fall... in love

The witchy winds, flying leaves, and bare limbs make me long to dance bare foot in dry grass, wild hair, billowing fabric flowing.

"There is almost nothing that has such a keen sense of fun as a fallen leaf"

What blushing fairy girl would not fall in love with the Autumn trees, ragged wings of red and brown flying in the wind.

Arthur Rackham

Amy in action...

Maybe it's because she is my lill sis but I have always thought Amy is just the cutest thing...

I think there is something to be said for the radiant beauty

of a person doing what they truly love.

plans out the window

Today is the day I was to return to the Bahamas. I had every thing I need to survive remote island life neatly packed. I rushed to assemble six months worth of frocks, shampoo, shoes, toothpaste, sunscreen, and all the other little necessities of life. San Salvidor Island has no stores, no not a one, so everything must be carefully prepared.

Imagine my surprise when two days before my return flight I discover that I am not cleared to return to work, due to a mixup between my doctors, and workman's comp. I was in shock, there was no doubt in my mind that I was going back today... but here I am, now with two more months to go.

It was just as much of a shock when I had to leave the Bahamas unexpectedly last May. Since January of last year, I have worked as a designer and dancer for the entertainment department of Club Med. During a dance performance gone very wrong, I broke my wrist and I had to come back to the states for surgery. At first I was heartbroken. I couldn't believe the injustice of it all. I didn't want to leave.

The surgery was tough, but the time that has followed will go down in memory as one of my most magical summers... so many beautiful experiences, I otherwise would have missed. I devoured the bliss of summer in all it's glory.... honey suckle, wild berries, emerald leaves, fireflies, Elmwood, wild flowers, and the love of baby kittens. I found myself surrounded by the love of my family... curling up with my mom like two peas in a pod, dancing in the rain, driving with my dad to New Hampshire swapping stories the whole way, and travels with Amy dreaming, scheming, laughing, creating and growing closer than ever.

So things are not going as I planed... makes me wonder what other unexpected magic fall has in store.

Change and change and change

Things happen for a reason, so they say and I find myself saying the same. More likely things just happen without rime, reason or divine intention...

Maybe it's a mechanism of cause and effect bringing, as if my magic, the circumstances we need to overcome. Or maybe it's just that every unexpected change shakes us awake from a drowsy auto pilot sleep. No one likes to be rudely awakened from a dream...

But perhaps it is the belief in a "reason" which sparks our awareness, enabling us to discover other paths, open to our embrace. If we are awake to the multitude of possibilities, we find our own good reasons.